Please note that this blog is written from a personal perspective and is not an indication of recommended treatment or coping strategies.
We’re seeing a lot online about how we should be coping with lockdown, isolation, staying motivated and being positive with the general state of the world. We are living in the most incredible times and all simply muddling through. And that’s more than ok.
In the lead up to lockdown when all we were seeing were reports on other countries my anxiety went through the roof. The fear of the unknown, fearing the worst and generally not feeling in control was a really hard thing to process especially because we were still having to carry on as normal, working and socialising. It almost came as a bit of a relief when lockdown was announced because it meant that I was able to control who I saw and what I did and as somebody who lives alone I could minimise my connections with the outside world. Despite this I caught Covid-19.
I caught the virus a couple of weeks ago and fortunately only suffered with mild symptoms. However this did mean not being able to get out of bed, being in pain, fever, coughing, having issues with my chest and generally struggling to function.
It was lonely and scary, more so having to isolate alone and only talk to those closest to me when I was able to.
When we talk about covid-19 and the implications it has on our health we think about it very much from a physical perspective, but what we don’t hear about is the mental effects that this has on us. Not just on those that have had the virus but everyone around us. We are one community.
The mental trauma of frontline staff will be deep and vast alongside those of us who have lost loved ones and are unable to fully stop and grieve. There is no doubt in my mind that we will see an increase in the need for mental health support following this pandemic to help those who haven’t been able to rationalise the chaos around them whether they are on the front line or simply mourning the life that will never be the same.
I feel like now more than ever it is important that if we are able to, checking in with one another and having genuinely open conversations not just about how we’re feeling in the moment but also how we feel about life going forward is so important.
If you are in a space where you feel you are mentally able to reach out even to one person with honesty and openness then you are making a difference. And if you’re not, that is totally ok.
To the founder and the team for this non profit I would like to reach out and thank you, I have done some researching as well as person to person meets with those who suffer from mental health. Then covid-19 hit. We were alone although we had friends and families,(those who we lived with) and those who were far away. It was and still is a trying time to recuperate from the losses we were dealt and the distance we had to create from the ones we loved to keep them safe. I know first hand how lonely we get when we have to stay at an arms length from those we deeply care about. I had to separate from most of the people I love to keep them safe from covid and that has taken a toll on me, sometimes I’m there but I’m not. In the field some call it a thousand yard stare, some call it a lost soul desperately trying to regain its grip from past trauma and losses. I suffer from ptsd and I stay an arm length from people now. Ever since covid it has been hard to try and regain my grip on who I am vs who I’m not and at times I struggle, sometimes more than others. My coworkers see it from time to time and it bothers me deeply to know what they see because they don’t know what to say or do. They just leave me be most of the time.
To those who suffered, to those who powerd through we can get through this.
Michael Smith