People remember the mothers, people forget the fathers. Be that the sleepless nights they have or the post natal. Yes that’s right I said it. Post natal. But wait isn’t that a woman’s thing? No. Post natal affects men as well as women.
Did you know that depression in men sores to a massive 68% following the birth of a child? As we know men, sorry, don’t like talking and subsequently mental health is the biggest killer in men under the age of 45. I have had post natal and its blinking horrible. It is different for everyone one so I can only tell you how it was for me and I will write about that in future blogs, however if I felt the guilt – I am ruining it for him, I’m not good enough – and I had the attention from visitors, doctors etc I cannot fathom how even more isolated and alone I would of felt if after a couple of weeks I had to go back to work, if people just slapped me on the back and bypassed me to get to my other half and the baby. Still having the sleepless nights, but having to get up and go do a full day’s work, come home and look after your other half and child wondering the same type of thoughts that I did.
The other side is people forget about the partners of someone with postnatal. They can become ill and feel like they cannot tell anyone. The thoughts of, did I cause this? Was it my fault? No one is responsible for anyone else’s mental health.
I am really proud to know Mark Williams from Fathers Reaching Out and even prouder to work with him. Today is the first international Father’s Mental Health day and over the weekend Prince William has come out saying that fathers should speak to their children about mental health. This is what we have been fighting for.
So celebrate. Make a Facebook status, send a tweet, contact the person that you are worried about to tell them you are thinking of them and you love them. Today may be the first but it will not be the last.